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Accept yourself for who you are November 9, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — Kerbear @ 4:15 pm

Ladies, as you age, please do not degrade your appearance verbally in front of your husband. As he ages, he is attracted to you, not what you were or “could be”.

I am seeing a trend of women becoming so vain. Women constantly worry about how they look and dress.  It seems they can’t have enough clothes, shoes, purses, & ‘stuff’.  Most women spend way too much time in the mirror judging themselves!

It’s fine to be yourself- be strong, independent, not helpless- but, remember that men have a need to meet your needs. Two people with the abilities and designs to be perfect compliments to each other often clash horribly when one or both refuses to meet the other’s need(s).

God designed us women perfectly- there are no mistakes in His design! Anything you may be lacking (whether or not you perceive it), your mate was designed to fulfill. What you dislike about your mate is often not something for you to try to change, but something to teach you what you decided not to learn or to help you change yourself.

Love is truly not about attraction. Attraction (of men to women) is built in to their design. Real love is kindness and graciousness in spite of what is unattractive. Real love seeks to meet the other person’s needs, not satisfy its own needs.

I am a new creature, not self-designed; I have begun to allow God to re-shape my thinking after 13 years of feeling like a failure at being a wife and mother. I have learned not to try to pressure my spouse to change; that leads to frustration, anxiety, and failed false-expectations. I pray and trust the One who designed my spouse for me, to change him when it is time AND to reveal to me the changes I must make for him.


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